Get Your Facebook Payout, if you Dare

Well, well, well, it looks like Facebook is finally paying up for its years of egregious privacy violations. And how generous of them to offer a whopping $725 million settlement to anyone who used their platform in the last 16 years!

I mean, who needs actual privacy anyway? It's not like we have a right to our own personal information or anything. And who cares that Facebook has been making billions off of our data without our consent? They're a struggling tech company, after all.

But hey, at least they're making it easy for us to claim our piece of the pie. All we have to do is navigate their undoubtedly user-friendly website and provide them with even more personal information. I'm sure they'll handle it with the utmost care and respect, just like they always have.

So go ahead, folks, fill out that claim and bask in the warm glow of Facebook's benevolence. After all, who wouldn't want to be paid off for their loss of privacy and personal data?